It’s more than OKAY to not be okay. I’m not. Yet. [Resources for Mental Wellness For All Women]
Whole Self-Care is about more than you. It’s a need not a nice-to-have. Especially NOW.
PLEASE NOTE: What I am about to share started as a social post on Facebook and I decided that it was more than that. Know that these are my thoughts and my experience, that I am sharing in hopes that it can support others that are feeling like me– regardless of what race or political party you identify as. It is not to take away from the Black Lives Matter movement, in fact, I hope that this helps us all unify more towards equality and justice. Being OK in the context of the title means being energetically well to be and do all that you feel called to. That is what I’d like to think all of us are working on supporting, becoming more educated on, and taking action surpassed this moment in time towards unity, justice, and equality… Equity. (Sidenote– 2020… WTH?!)
I feel like we’ve gone mad as a country due to our leadership (or lack thereof) and all there is left is our own self-leadership. In order for us to unify we need to each take on the responsibility of our own health and well-being.
I think most of us are not okay.
People of color sure aren’t.
I am not okay.
I am struggling with focus.
My soul feels crippled.
I am in a fog.
I didn’t realize how much of an empath I am… All the feels are being felt all the time.
PLUS, having the kiddos home full-time because of the Coronavirus Pandemic as we continue quarantine or shelter-in-place (I’ve lost how long it’s been now). Add to that them saying my name every 1.5 seconds.
Our kiddos are energetically feeling it too– they are feeling us and the world. Even if they aren’t conscious to it or well at communicating it.
Black moms and mamas of color — I can’t even begin to imagine. I am so very sorry. I am just starting to understand but know it’s different for each of us. I am with you. I link my arms with you. We will do better and especially for our babies.
And, while I get that it may not be the time to ‘be about me’– it starts with each of us as individuals to serve the whole.
I share with my clients and those in my circles on the I am Mom & I am Me: The More Than A Parent Collective, as well as on the More Than A Parent podcast— that in order to be More Than A Parent and serve– we need to work on filling ourselves up first so that we can service from our OVERFLOW vs. serving when we are EXHAUSTED– because then, all we can serve is EXHAUST from that exhaustion.
💓🎙 I created a podcast roundup on WHOLE SELF-CARE last month, with all going on with COVID-19 for mamas filled with some amazing women sharing tips, practices, and considerations. You can watch it or hear it starting at episode 16 at www.cazgaddis.com/e016 (relevant more than ever now)
Many of us are depleted.
Anxious as all hell.
Stressed out over human rights through Black Lives Matter, Pandemic-level worries on health, finances, unemployment, childcare, and life as we know it. Add some killer bees and monkeys who stole COVID-19 samples in India and you realize we all somehow are in the most bizarre sci-fi movie called 2020.
PLEASE make sure you take time for YOU.
I am needing to also do this because I feel it.
It’s about BEYOND US.
Then we can serve more powerfully from a place of wholeness and empower others, too. We are going to need all the energy we can get to make a difference and get through this shit.
While being as ‘together’ as is possible within our self.
Sending you the BIGGEST virtual hug in the history of ever.
I will be pausing for a bit to replenish, recenter, and refresh. If this resonates with you I invite you to do the same.
It can look different for each of us depending on what we need most at that moment. Whole self-care and wellness can also vary from one day to the next.
It doesn’t mean you are not moving forward with the Black Lives Movement or other things in your life that need you. It means you take a moment for you so then you can be more full to fulfill those things.
As strong, as brilliant, as loving, and as powerful as we may be, we weren’t built to be superheroes — we were built to be human.— Threads of Solidarity, “Giving from an empty cup/How not to die”
RESOURCES TO NURTURE YOUR MENTAL WELLNESS & WHOLE SELF-CARE
* This will continue to be updated. Feel free to add additional resources in the comments below or reach out to me with suggestions and resources.
While many of these resources are for people of color– there are additional resources intertwined in the list below for all of is. We are all feeling it.
If you are a mama and are feeling everything going on as a woman of *any* color, I invite you to join the I am mom & me: the more than a parent collective for a safe space to have open conversations, ask questions, get support. You can also and register for one of the upcoming “Bras Off” Conscious Circle experiences to process through what you are feeling and the things you want to get off your chest. I am right alongside you.
Resources Supporting Black Women
- JUNE 5 opportunity: Circle of Care for Black Womxn
- Self-Care Tips for Black People Who Are Struggling With This Very Painful Week
- Taraji P. Henson’s Foundation Providing Free Mental Health Therapy for the Black Community
- 8 Mental Health Resources for Black Folks – Because You Deserve Support Right Now (June 1, 2020)
- The Unbearable Grief of Black Mothers
- 44 Mental Health Resources for Black People Trying to Survive in This Country
- Black Lives Matter Meditation
- Mental Health Awareness Month: Depression and the Black Superwoman Syndrome
Resources Supporting All Women (includes Women Of Color as that is more expansive)
- An Activist-Therapist’s 15 Affirmations for Hope Amidst COVID-19
- 3 Tips You Can Try Right Now to Improve Your Mental Health
- To Navigate Your Mental Wellbeing, You Need to Use Your Body
- Betterhelp is offering one month of free therapy (as of June 2020)
- Filling our Cups: 4 Ways People of Color can Foster Mental Health and Practice Restorative Healing
- A guide on finding mental help from professionals that “get” your cultural background
- For Mothers of Black Boys
- Young People of Color Support Guide
Get Nurtured on Social Media (It’s Possible)
- Black Joy Isn’t Frivolous—It’s Necessary
*Once you nurture yourself* and as you start to look at ways to infuse your daily interactions both personally and professionally, check out these resources:
How To Be An Strong Ally
- How you can be an ally to the Black Lives Matter Movement
- Guide to Allyship
- Guidelines for being strong white allies
- How to be a good white ally, according to activists
- How Can I Become a Better White Ally?
- How to be an ally during the George Floyd Protests
- Anatomy of a good ally
- Ben & Jerrys (YES- the ice cream brand!): What It Means to Be an “Ally” and 8 Ways to Do It